Wardrobe Malfunctions

Wardrobe Malfunctions!

20^th July 2011

This cruise I’ve been on gangway quite a lot, mainly shooting and I’ve got to admit, I’m getting much, much quicker. The same goes for my cropping but there are times when it gets a little loose. Today however I’m in my favourite gangway costume as… the Crete Girl!

The costume was still in the lab so I had to get up at 06.00 and run down to pick it up. I was so tired that I ended up dragging my backside out of bed at 06.030 leaving me little time to get ready.

Getting the costume I decided to just get dressed in the lab. Putting the white under shirt on and something didn’t look right. It was all baggy and falling off me. Then it clicked. The elastic in the shoulder line had snapped. Chucking the dress over my head and there was nothing to lace it up with. The lace hadn’t made it out of the Crew Laundry. Putting my shirt back on, I run up the stairs to come down another flight on the opposite side of the water tight doors (you’ve got to love the water tight doors!) and popped into the laundry. 

The Indonesian lads in Laundry are always so nice and when I told them that the lace wasn’t with the dress a couple had a look around for me. They couldn’t find it but found something else that I could use as a substitute. Thanking them, I ran back up to Deck 1 and to the cabin.

While changing into the costume there was a knock at the door. It was Camila asking to borrow my white gangway trainers as hers were hurting her feet. No chance. I had 5 minutes to get ready in, it was pitch black because I couldn’t turn the light on without waking Luci and there was no way I could find anything under the mountain of shoes and bags on the floor. She hadn’t even got the rail from the lab yet.

Zoran was having a field day trying to find David’s gangway shorts to wear but thinks Fabio’s done something to them in one of his overly drunken moments.

Camila soon came back into the corridor with the rail. The only problem was it didn’t have the Greek flag inside. It was completely bare. When we told her she needed to have a flag inside the ring she went mental, shouting at us in Portuguese “you all expect me to know everything. None of you have told me it had to have a flag. You haven’t taught me anything”. She’s been here long enough to know that the ring and rail always have a flag with the name of the port on it. Storming off she went back to the lab. 

The rest of us headed onto the gangway where we found the rail in the open and no one watching it. Zoran and I picked up the rail and put it to one side. 

Coming back a little later Camila was carrying a tiny Greek flag. We told her that wasn’t the right one to which she said there wasn’t anymore. There are normally stacks of them in the lab but she was insisting there wasn’t any in the folders where we store the flags.

Zoran was shooting me and we always work well together. We were skipping around and literally chasing after guests who refused to have their photo taken. So many people were pegging it away from us thinking we wouldn’t chase and grab them. Most laughed at us running after them and stopped and had their photo taken. Others had to be grabbed and turned around towards the camera before they’d put their arm around me and smiled for the camera. It was all a great laugh. 

There were a couple of people getting pissed off at us for constantly being hounded by photographers. We were all doing it with a smile on our faces and having a laugh. Some didn’t quite take it like that. One person shouted at us to which I replied “Miss, you’re going to miss having us treating you like celebrities, running after and papping you”. She wasn’t amused. 

One guy shrugged me off saying he couldn’t have his photo taken with us because his wife was jealous… looking over at his wife, I suggested she should jump in too. She simply looked at me like dirt and walked off. So did her husband. Zoran and I looked at each other in amazement before cracking up and running towards someone else. A lot of people were recognising me and calling, “Hey Lou! We’ll get a picture with you”. It was great fun.

Taking a break quick break to have a drink, I went down to the lab to see if I could find some of the Crete/Greek signs for Camila. 

Walking through the Crew Laundry they all started whistling and cheering. One of the lads, Edi, simply held his hands out, pointing to my costume with a big smile on his face. Everyone, including myself was laughing. I shouted “Calm it you lot” which just made them laugh more. The Indonesian lads from laundry are always so cheerful and laughing!

Camila was right, the folders were where they should be but there was nothing in any the Crete folder. Where the hell had the signs gone? There were loads of them!

Going back to the cabin, I had a quick cigarette and drink before Zoran and I headed back onto the gangway. When we reached 250 images we’d come back in for another break. It wasn’t long until we reached our 250 images. 

Unfortunately, our time on the gangway was cut short by the sound of “Bravo, Bravo, Bravo…” It was time for the red drill. Zoran and I both held red emergency cards and therefore had to head back onto the ship. I had get out of my gangway costume and into my uniform before the alarm sounded. The alarm itself took longer than usual. I had time to sit down with Zoran and have a quick can of Fanta before it sounded. Grabbing my life jacket I headed up to Deck 5.

Once upstairs Becky ticked me off the list and someone came around and asked us security questions. Regina was there and explained to me what we were going to do. It was my first drill in this section and I had no idea about what was going on. The life rafts were ready to be lowered.

After an hour and a half of waiting around and endless calls for certain people to get to their emergency stations, we were all called to our life raft points. The drill couldn’t end until everyone holding a red card was ticked off the list. For that alone, the drill look an hour longer than usual. 

My life raft point was the same as my muster station. We all had our life jackets on and finding it hard to stay awake... More waiting around. After another 30 minutes the announcement came for all crew members participating in the life raft exercise to board their rafts.

There were six of us in our life boat. My job was to grab an oar when we hit the water and push the boat away from the ship. There were two of us doing the job. Two guys were at the back of the boat to release the clamp from the wires and one at the front. The final person was the “captain” of the life boat who was in charge of driving. 

Once a couple of metres away from the ship, the engine started and we were speeding off into the sea. Two minutes later the engine cut out. There were about eight other life boats around us, just floating. 

This is the procedure – we get away from the ship, group together as much as possible and just wait for help. The boats were rocking side to side and bobbing up and down! If you get sea sick easily, you’ll be turning green within no time at all!

The “Captain” of the life boat told two of the men to come over. He taught them how to work the life boat and steer. They both had a go of driving around in circles for five minutes or so. After we were just waiting around for the other boats to join us and the call to come back in. I was also told that next time there’s a drill and I was going to have a go at driving the life boat – I couldn’t wait!! 

Finally, after what seemed an age, a voice crackled over the walkie-talkie telling us to head back to the ship. The captain of our life boat said that when it’s windy the boat will slam against the side of the ship – oh joys. 

Once it was secured we climbed out and onto the deck. From there we had to climb up a ladder to the point where we all had a go at cranking up the life boat until it was suspended over the deck. It was like doing a work out at the gym!! The girls went first, the higher the boat got, the harder it became to crank up and that’s when the men took over.

Once we’d all climbed back down, we picked up our life jackets and were dismissed. The drill was finally over after 2 and a half hours. 

I had an hour left of my break before going back to work. I bumped into Zoran on back deck and we sat around talking for a bit before going up a couple of decks for something to eat.

It was formal night tonight and we were already shattered. We’d both missed our chance to get some sleep and it was now time for set up. For the fourth formal night in a row Zoran was shooting ship and boy, was he getting sick to death of it! I’m being alternated between two boring backdrops – Bow and Titanic. There’s really no point in even looking at my formal schedule anymore because I know what’s coming. Fabio is always on LSP. David’s reign on black is over and all the new members of the team are shooting centrums and stairs while the more experienced ones are on crap, "learner's" backdrops. 

The worst thing about it all was that Sanela was put on Stairs one formal night, didn’t take many photos and approximately 95% of her shots were out of focus. The same happened the following formal night when she was on Centrum 3. 95% of all her shots were completely out of focus while the background was as sharp as a pin!! It didn’t make sense to us.

Set up took longer than it should – as it always does. By the time we were finished we had a couple of hours until it was show time. I had an hour to sleep. 

The night was a bit of a drag, no one wanted their photos taken. We were smudging as much as we could until the middle of the second session. By then it was obvious we weren’t going to get anywhere. After the second Ressi, we were back in the studio for one last session. One hour to go and the studios were dead. 

The singers came onto the Royal Promenade bridge and 70’s Night began and it wasn’t long until the party was in full swing. The guests were all rushing over. David had to quickly dismantle his studio on the Promenade as the crowd grew bigger and bigger. People will even try to stand on the light’s power packs to get a bigger view of what’s going on!! 

There wasn’t long left and my side of Deck 5 was empty. The dining room was empty too. Not even the Italians were out… and that’s saying something. David started breaking down the studio where Fede had been before he started his long night of printing in the lab.  With nothing to do, I helped. With 10 minutes left, David told me to gather my stuff, download my images and bring the studio bag up. In the meantime he’d break my studio down.

Soon we’d all closed our studios and downloaded our images. We were all breaking down our studios. Those who had broken theirs down already were moving on to other studios to help out. 

Starting from Deck 5 we loaded all the equipment in and moved down to Deck 4 where we did the same. Three people had to run down to Deck 3 as there was no more space in the lift. From there, we all worked as quickly as possible to shift everything into the store and finish up for the night.

With break down done, all that was left was the pizza. Two of the lads had already gone for pizza but in recently weeks we’ve been having a lot of problems with getting food on formal nights. It was getting a bit playground-like and incredibly petty. The cooks simply didn't want to make us pizza!

Looking around at everyone… we were all completely shattered. Port days and formal nights really aren’t a good mix!!

Popular on the Gangway! :-o

Crete Girl and Shooter

BEST gangway photo EVER!